Ride into the Danger Zone (stepping out and taking a risk)

This week I am attending the WorkHuman 2015 Conference in Orlando, Florida. The goal of this conference is to help companies find ways to create a community of support and positivity that brings greater meaning to everyone’s work lives. I’ll share what I learn here and on Twitter (@mkfaulkner43 #WorkHuman).

If you’re going to make a mistake, make a mistake of passion.
– Dr. Montgomery, jazz teacher

If I had a pick a word for Day One of WorkHuman, I would say it’s Balance.

Day Two, I would pick Risk. As in, take more of them.

I like this word. In fact, I LOVE this word. Risk. It’s a good one and it reminds all of us that innovation and greatness doesn’t come from sitting on our ass waiting for someone to tell us the best way to do things. We have to go for it.

All the keynote speakers so far today – Rob Lowe (yes, he IS that pretty in real life) and Nilofer Merchant (FOLLOW HER) – pushed the idea of stretching your comfort zone, taking big risks, not being afraid to fail, to BE WEIRD.

We are so hard-wired to stay in our boxes, follow the rules, conform. It’s time we embrace the fact that danger is a necessary ingredient to realizing our full potential.

We all work with and for people who never look outside of the four walls of their particular business, who believe the experience they have and the way they have always done things is exactly the right and best way to do it.

And you know what? It might be. For them. In that system. In that industry.

But for the rest of us? We need to be bold. We need to show courage. We need to stop thinking and start doing.

As employees, this means sharing our ideas and making proposals that we think are smart. Yes – there is a very real chance that it will get shot down the first, second, tenth time. But if you don’t believe in your idea enough to keep reworking it, getting more data, and trying again, why do you think anyone else would believe in it? The approval of others isn’t the only measure as to whether or not you have a good idea. Just because they don’t see it and get it, doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist.

As leaders, it means stopping our incessant need to “protect” – to protect what we have, to protect what our teams have, to protect some perceived notion of security. Leaders are EXACTLY in the right position to rock the boat – and rock it a lot – in order to move their business forward. Leaders have the influence, the knowledge, and the audience to be able to take real risk and make a difference. Leaders will set the example that risk-taking – and potential failure – is okay, encouraged, and ultimately, valued because of the impact it can have on the organization.

It doesn’t mean you get to be stupid about it.

It means you believe in the validity of an idea so much that you want it to succeed.

It means you believe in yourself enough that you know you are someone worth taking a risk for.

Risk taking is contagious. It breaks the status quo and challenges our assumptions about what we do, how we do it, and most importantly, why we do it. Risk taking made Rob Lowe a star and made Nilofer Merchant a successful businesswoman and author. They embraced their drive, embraced their beliefs, embraced a dream. And that’s why they’re standing on a stage telling the rest of us how to take risks – because they’ve already done it.

Embrace the danger. Move the business forward. Move yourself forward.

Take a risk.

Only those who will risk going too far can possibly find out how far one can go.
– T. S. Eliot

Savvy, not sell-out (navigating office politics)

Throughout my career – in HR and otherwise – I have encountered numerous people who insisted that they don’t believe in office politics.

Well, to paraphrase Neil deGrasse Tyson, it doesn’t matter whether or not you believe in office politics. They still exist. And if you want to be successful in your job, regardless of level, you are going to have to figure out how to deal with them.

The number one thing people need to remember when dealing with office politics is that you CAN still be “you” while adjusting your style to fit the situation. I’ve talked to employees and leaders alike who claim they would be a fake if they were anything else but fully authentic. Here’s the thing – there’s “authentic” and AUTHENTIC. The first kind involves flexibility with staying aligned with your values, and successful professionals typically practice that. The second kind involves a loud, in-your-face, I-gotta-be-me approach that people who use psych profiles (think DiSC) to justify being pushy. (“I’m a D, dammit!! I’m supposed to be that way!”)

In order to be successful in business, you are going to have to figure out how to navigate the politics of any organization’s culture. I use the word “politics” deliberately, as the players each have an agenda they are trying to advance. Some of these agendas are altruistic, some completely selfish – but they all compete even if they ostensibly strive to meet the same goals. That’s why you are going to have to learn to play this game.

So how do you play without losing yourself in the fray? By knowing how to be savvy without being a sellout, and without being your overly AUTHENTIC self. Check out these scenarios:

Boss suggests a course of action that you don’t think is going to work:
- Overly AUTHENTIC response: That’s a terrible idea that won’t work. Let me tell you why.
- Sell-out response: You’re the boss. We’ll make that happen.
- Savvy response: That’s definitely an option. Have we thought about X, Y, Z?

Executives begin arguing with each other about small details in your business proposal:
- Overly AUTHENTIC response: Are we really going to spend time talking about this now?
- Sell-out response: Sure, we can do that. You guys just tell us what you want and we’ll do it.
- Savvy response: It sounds like we have some details to work out. Do we have an agreement in the general direction and we can talk about the small details off-line? Or maybe, Would it be helpful to see the full proposal before delving into the details? Maybe your questions will be answered.

Coworker becomes overly aggressive/belligerent in a meeting:
- Overly AUTHENTIC response: Oh, you did NOT just say that to me!!! (typically accompanied by a waving finger)
- Sell-out response: Hey, hey…we can do whatever you want to do. Let’s just all try to get along
- Savvy response: I can see that you’re upset, and that’s not my intention. What are your concerns?

Notice a trend in these responses? The savvy response is all about finding a solution without losing ground. It’s about focusing on the issue and not on the person (either you OR the other party). You can adjust the Savvy Response to be in your voice, and in fact, you should. The more it sounds like you, the more likely the others in the room will listen and less you’ll feel like you’re selling out to the pressures in the situation.

So the next time you’re in a politically-charged situation, be prepared to translate your overly AUTHENTIC response into one that will ensure you’re heard and one that moves towards a solution. And you don’t even have to sell your soul to do it.

Authenticity requires a certain measure of vulnerability, transparency, and integrity.
~ Janet Louise Stephenson

The truth will set you free…but first it will piss you off.
~ Unknown

Finding your voice (or…writer’s block sucks)

Full disclosure: I’ve started and stopped about 5 different posts today.

I come up with a title, write a sentence or two, and then stare at the computer. Or my phone. Or the TV (Chopped is on, people!). It sucks. It’s frustrating. I hate it.

Rather than fight through and try to write a post that refuses to be written, I hit “save draft,” open a new window, and start writing a new post.

Lather. Rinse. Repeat.

I take this approach because forcing words down on the page results in a crappy product. Stephen King once said that you should first write for yourself, then worry about the audience. He also says that you need stick to your own style because that’s the only way you’ll have truthiness – and I think he’s right. I have to write in a way that feels true to my voice and my weird perspective on things or else the story and meaning falls flat.

And so I keep changing my approach, trying on different topics to see if one “fits” better today so I can write the whole darn thing.

Writer’s block in leadership is sort of like this, but instead of trying to write a post that just won’t be written, you end up unable to lead – saying the same things over and over again to your employees the exact same way and then end up surprised that they STILL aren’t changing their behavior.

You can break your “leader’s block” by following Stephen King’s advice. Rather than trying to go “by the book” and follow someone else’s leadership model or process to the letter, you need to first lead for yourself…then worry about your employees. Find your own voice and perspective – and the employees will respond.

Ask yourself:

Why am I a leader? Do I like being a leader?
Assuming I DO like being a leader, what do I like about it?
What do I think a leader’s job IS? Am I doing that job?
What are some aspects of other leaders I admire? How can I incorporate it into my personal style?

None of these questions is a cure for leader’s block on its own. It’s the equivalent of practicing your writing until your own perspective shines through. Leaders grow through experience, through trial and error. You owe it to yourself – and your employees – to break through your block and find your voice. Keep trying; keep leading; keep exploring.

Lather. Rinse. Repeat.

You learn best by reading a lot and writing a lot, and the most valuable lessons of all are the ones you teach yourself. – Stephen King

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