Slow or fast, we’re all in the same race (lessons from the driver’s seat)

No, this isn’t going to be an introspective look at the fleeting immediacy of life. I mean, that’s a real thing and you should really think deep profound thoughts about it, but I’m not in the mood.

I’m in the mood to talk about driving.

As readers of this blog know, I always wanted to be a stunt car driver. I don’t really remember why that was something I wanted to do. It just looked like a lot of fun, and the drivers were badass.

I’m not a stunt car driver (yet), but I have gotten a chance to live like one for a few hours. It’s called autocross – and if you’ve never gotten to do it, I highly recommend it. It’s so choiceIMG_2998

Basically, autocross is a giant parking lot or other paved area with a course laid out in cones. It might be a hairpin turn, followed by a slalom, followed by a 90-degree turn, etc. You get a series of runs throughout the day, each one timed. If you hit a cone, you get a time penalty. If you miss a “gate” or go off-course, you officially get a DNF (did not finish), but unofficially you still get to drive the rest of the course like a baller.

This was the second such event I’ve had a chance to do and, like a lot of people in my line of work, I couldn’t help but notice some similarities to the workplace.

Someone else may lay out the course, but you choose how you attack it.
In autocross, like a lot of jobs, there are a series of obstacles/tasks you have to tackle. The cool thing is that we get to choose the way to get through them. In autocross, you see people who go as fast as they can, slamming on their brakes to course correct, and sometimes it’s not pretty. Ultimately, though, they learn from their mistakes and do better next time. Some people start very slowly and tentatively, afraid to make mistakes, learning the course. And as their confidence grows, they get faster and better. Your job is the same way. You can go fast and furious, or go slow and cautious. Each approach teaches different lessons, and the “driver” (employee) can either choose to learn from them and improve, or get the lesser result.

Most mistakes are minor. Don’t freak out. Keep going.
If you hit a cone in autocross, you get a 2 second penalty. And people might give you a hard time. If you miss a gate or something, a corner worker makes a big X with their arms and you get a DNF for the run…but you get to keep driving and you learned something. Most work mistakes are similar. Did you send out an email with a minor typo? Okay, you goofed up. Own it and learn from it. Did you forget to staple ALL the packets? Nobody died. Don’t be afraid to make minor mistakes. (And if you’re a leader, realize your people will make them!) The important thing is to learn from it.

Some mistakes ARE a big deal. Recognize when it could happen.
In these types of driving events, you don’t drive all that fast. But cars do sometimes spin out and go flying off the course. If you’re working a corner, you need to be alert and position yourself in a place that will minimize your risk of getting hit. Not all jobs are life and death, but SOME ARE. Inattention can and does get people killed. Whether you’re the person doing the dangerous activity, or the support person watching that activity, be alert and do what you can to ensure safety protocol is followed. We all want to get to the finish line in one piece.

People doing the same thing at the same time have SOMETHING in common. Work with that.
People who do autocross events have all different types of cars and come from a variety of backgrounds. In a generic social setting, it’s doubtful that any of them would hang out. But put them in this situation and suddenly they are best friends, trading driving tips and encouraging each other to improve each run. Your coworkers may not be people you’d choose to socialize with. In fact, people are socializing with coworkers less and less these days. And it may be impacting our work experience. So while you don’t have to be a best friend or anything, it’s okay to loosen up and talk like people now and then.

Have a good time.
You’re driving a car through a crazy course. OF COURSE YOU’RE GOING TO HAVE FUN. Granted, work isn’t going to be a super fun autocross event every day. But hopefully parts of it are. And if it isn’t, try to find ways to make it a good time. You’re there for too many hours in your life.

Whatever you do – in your “real” life or your “work” life – it’s important to remember that while we all have different approaches, we are all still just trying to finish the race.

Start strong, stay strong, and finish strong by always remembering why you’re doing it in the first place.
– Ralph Marston

Tell me what you want (what you really, really want)

When you were a kid, did you know what you wanted to be when you grew up?

I did. I wanted to be a stunt car driver. Given the way I like to drive, there are some who would argue I haven’t let go of that dream just yet.

Considering that I don’t have “stunt car driver” on my LinkedIn profile, you can assume I embarked on a different career path.

But was it a conscious choice? Did I mean to end up where I did? Do any of us?

Ambivalence

I just finished reading Brigid Schulte’s book Overwhelmed: Work, Love and Play When No One Has The TimeIt has some excellent data to support the notion that American’s are too busy, but that it’s a combination of personal choice, cultural pressure, and business practice that continues to promote our need to one-up each other with our insane schedules.

Wannabe Pic 1 285 x 228In the book Schulte examines the idea of ambivalence – being of two minds. She posits that ambivalence is often at the heart of our feelings of being overwhelmed, that we are really of two minds of what we want that we can’t fully commit to either. Like the time we think it would be really cool to be an SVP of marketing, but then we realize how much travel it would take to get there, and while we really like travel, we’re worried about what our friends might think, and what if we have a significant other who’s not okay with that, and really, isn’t just easier to take the other job and get the paycheck?

Sound a little too familiar?

Choices

Think about your own career. Think about the path you took to get where you are right now. Was it deliberate? Was it all “Forrest Gump-y”? Was it a little of both?

The folks who are happiest in their careers tend to be because they CHOSE to be where they are today. They have defined their own idea of success and have gone after it. And no, it might not be the dream they had when they were a little kid, or even the career they thought they wanted in college. Maybe they had a few jobs along the way that they sort of liked, as well as a few they couldn’t stand.

At some point, though, they came to a crossroads. They could continue down the path they once envisioned but no longer loved, or they could take matters into their own hands and define their own success, and go for it. As a result, they are in the right place at exactly the right time.

And while they might be very busy, they are seldom overwhelmed.

So what?

As both leaders and those being led, it’s important to recognize a crossroad.

As a leader, we can help our employees articulate what success means to them and then help identify whether their current state is equal to that success. If not, we can help them find the right path. Remember, our job as leaders is to help our employees reach their true potential – and sometimes that means moving on.

As an employee, we can help our leaders understand what it is we are trying to accomplish. We can accept the responsibility for our careers and recognize that life isn’t something that happens too us – it’s something in which we are an active participant. If there is friction between how we define success and how our leader defines success, it’s vital that we speak up. Our leaders can’t help us if we don’t admit we need that help.

Define your success

No, I didn’t end up being a stunt driver. Or an astronaut.Or a social studies teacher. Or a mad scientist….yet.

And that’s cool. I’m still figuring it out – like a lot of people. Like you, maybe.

No matter where you stand on the overwhelmed/ambivalent spectrum today, don’t panic.

There’s still time for you to define your success.  There is still time to be an active participant in life.

There is still time to choose.

And if you aren’t sure what you want – what you really, really want – it’s okay.

You’ll figure it out.


Sometimes the wrong choices bring us to the right places.
-Unknown

Connecting the dots (and by dots, I mean people)

Note: This week I am at the annual National SHRM Convention in Las Vegas, NV. And in case you’re wondering if it it’s hot in Las Vegas in July, the answer is HELL YES. The heat…my god, man, THE HEAT.

As we enter the final day of this national gathering of HR folks, the attendees will be thinking about what they really got out of this experience.

  • Were the sessions worth it? Many of them were. Hopefully you chose wisely!
  • Were the keynotes good? Mika Brzezinski was. Her message about knowing your value resonated. And even if you disagreed with her, she made you think about WHY you disagreed.]
  • Were the boxed lunches good? No. 
  • Was the Expo Hall helpful? Depends on your goals. May you connect with many good vendors!
  • Did you have fun at Jennifer Hudson? No one called me for bail money, so you must have balanced it right!

What strikes me about this week as I talk to fellow attendees is how much they talk about different people they’ve met. About the woman working in Iowa as an HR Department of One and how much she has in common with the man in California facing the same challenges. About the folks on the shuttle bus chatting about their day, laughing knowingly about a session as if they were old friends. About the online friends who have been connected for a couple of years who finally got a chance to meet face to face.

I attend SHRM not just because I want to see the sessions, or keynotes, or go to Vegas. (Wait…what?)connect-the-dots

I attend SHRM because I want to connect with the online community who has welcomed me, supported me, mocked me (I’m looking at you, Stollack), and embraced me as one of their own. I am not here in any sort of official blogging/social media capacity and yet I’ve been able to hang with these folks, participate in fantastic conversations, and share my opinions with this fascinating, smart group of people.

Last night at dinner, Jason Lauritsen (yes, I’m name dropping) stopped for a moment and reflected on the growth of this little online family, and how SHRM has become a type of family reunion – a chance to reconnect on a human level with people who have been scattered around the nation.

Jason’s right. SHRM really is about the connections we make. But what’s more important are the connections we SUSTAIN.

My challenge to you as you go back to your homes and to your lives (or to the casinos) is to ensure you sustain the connections you make in life. Help connect people to those who can help each other. And plan ways to keep those connections fresh through face-to-face meetings.

The simple truth is that for all the process and product our companies deal with, it’s the PEOPLE that matter.

Connect. Sustain. Refresh.

It’s that simple.